Monday, September 28, 2009

Good Authority Officing

We always love talking about our future plans for our empire. Lately we've been talking a lot about an official Good Authority office - where it would be, how we would decorate, what kind of snacks we'd have. You know, all of the important stuff. We're not as worried about the less critical stuff, like office equipment, phone and internet connections and various other telecommunications products and services, and oh yeah, how to pay for it. Those minor details will work themselves out.

So we were talking about how much fun it would be to have a receptionist to answer our many many important phone calls. And then we thought, why stop there? We should totally have our own call centers to provide support to our many fans and customers. (Instead of a receptionist, we could have a director of call center operations.) They can be scattered across the country and eventually the world, once we achieve global fame. It's a very practical and reasonable idea, we think. There are a lot of people out there who need to have their Good Authority-related needs met at all times.

But then we realized that we just have a romanticized view of the whole call center thing thanks to our recent viewing of the fabulous movie The Other End of the Line, in which the dude from John Tucker Must Die plays a guy who falls in love with the Indian-but-pretending-to-be-American woman who works at the credit card call center and helps him with his fraudulent charge issues. (Happens all the time.) Of course, she falls for him too, so she comes to America to find him and wacky multicultural hijinks ensue.

So, we were forced to face the fact that having our own call centers won't bring us happiness or true love, and further, the reason we'll never need them is because all of our strategic planning meetings devolve into 'hey, let's watch this horrible cheesy movie with that John Tucker guy!' Maybe we should just start with a personal assistant to help keep us organized...and to make the popcorn.

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