Sixtyfive Roses

May is Cystic Fibrosis Awareness Month, so before the month ends we wanted to highlight an amazing book on the subject called Sixtyfive Roses: A Sister's Memoir by Heather Summerhayes Cariou. If you've read any of our posts about attending the International Women's Writing Guild conference, Heather's name might be familiar to you. If not, just know that we've described her as a "force of nature". Basically, she's awesome.

Heather's sister Pam had cystic fibrosis, and the book is about Pam's story, Heather's relationship with her sister, and their family's journey.

My sister Pam was diagnosed with Cystic Fibrosis at the age of four and given only a short time to live. I promised to die with her, but as Pam fought the limits of her prognosis, she instead taught me how to live. “Sixtyfive Roses” is the way Pam pronounced the disease that altered the lives of my siblings and parents, who in turn helped alter the community’s response to the disease by founding the Canadian Cystic Fibrosis Foundation. With the help of the Foundation, research, and new treatments, the fight to save Pam lasted for years, ending with her death at the age of 26. We had to learn to survive the tragedy of my sister's illness, and her loss.
SIXTYFIVE ROSES offers an "unsparing" eyewitness account of the pain, hope and valor of a family in crisis as it falls apart and pulls itself together again and again, only to emerge stronger and more loving. At the heart of the story is the relationship between me and Pam as sisters. As we journey through childhood, adolescence and young adulthood, each of us struggles for autonomy, yet helps the other learn where to find joy and meaning in a world of pain and uncertainty.
This is not just a story about a disease. SIXTYFIVE ROSES is about fighting for your life and never giving up. It’s about loving fearlessly and the choices we make in the name of love. It’s about the kind of faith, fortitude and forgiveness we tell ourselves we don’t possess, but which is present in all of us. Ultimately, SIXTYFIVE ROSES illuminates what we must all come to understand about the nature of life and death.
“There is no happy ending. But there is the day. The sun, the rain. The chance to say I love you. The willingness to forgive. The courage to remember. The opportunity to be kind. The ability to laugh and to be generous. The fact that we can choose our joy in each moment, no matter what. This, in itself, is the miracle.” [SixtyfiveRosesTheBook.com]

This probably goes without saying, but have your tissues handy, especially towards the end. It's such a powerful book. There were times when I wanted to jump into the book and give young Heather a hug, but it helps to know that she got through it all and grew into the rock star that she is today. (Yeah, it totally sounds like we're kissing up right now, but if you know her you get it.)

One of the special things about Sixtyfive Roses is that it tells the story of coping with a serious illness from the perspective of a well sibling, whose needs and voices can often get overlooked in the moment, and an experience that's relevant to a lot of people even if they're not affected by cystic fibrosis specifically. The same goes for her insight into the experience of being a part of a family in crisis. She says at one point that "it's the small things that people in crisis need". It's a great lesson and reminder for everyone about how important and meaningful it is to try to put ignorance or fear or awkwardness aside and just be there for people, even if at first you're not sure exactly what to say or do.

So, this is definitely not just a "cystic fibrosis book". (Although it would still be great if it was.) It's about...well, everything. Life, death, love, family. But we'll let Heather tell you about it in her own words:




Just trust us and read it, you won't regret it. For more information and to get the book:

Sixtyfive Roses Official Website

Sixtyfive Roses: A Sister's Memoir [Amazon]

Sixtyfive Roses: A Sister's Memoir [Powells]

Would you buy a laptop for a 10 year old?

Remember when we were kids and the idea a phone in our bedroom was like a really big deal? Having our own line was almost unthinkable. Maybe the most expensive electronic gift we might have asked our parents for was a Gameboy or a walkman. If we were lucky, we may have had a clunky slow computer in our house, but we had to share it with the whole family and our gaming options were limited to stuff like Frogger.

Times have certainly changed.

Lil' Lilith (my 10-year-old) has a nicer iPod than I do, a DSi, and her own cell phone (for emergencies only, but still.) Now she wants a laptop and wants to start her own blog. I'm afraid we're going to have to wait on the latter (she'll have to settle for guest blogging for the ESC  for now) but I'm actually considering letting her have her own computer. The main reason is pure selfishness: I want her to quit borrowing mine! Doesn't she know I have important Facebooking blogging to do?

Some people think that it's crazy to let a kid that young have their own computer, but those arguments come mostly from the older generation - that didn't grow up with computers, etc. Lil' Lilith's generation has never known a world without the Internet. While many parents question whether or not it's safe to let our kids online (be it for play, schoolwork or "social networking") we can't ignore the fact that computer proficiency is a required skill nowadays, even for kids at the elementary school level. What do you think about letting kids use the Internet? How young is too young?

Honestly, I'm not that concerned about it. She's a really smart kid, she's incredibly responsible and has so far  proven herself to be very good about following online safety rules. Plus it's not as though I would allow her to The real problem is that computers are friggin expensive!! Even the "cheap" ones are way up there and it's hard to justify spending a lot of money on a computer for a fourth grader.

As always, I turned to Savings.com for online discounts and coupon codes... I found some great HP coupons and Dell coupon codes. So now my real question, is what kind of computer do you readers recommend? I'm looking for something that is not just cost-efficient, but also user-friendly and durable (she's smart and responsible, but she's still 10!!)

Advice is needed! (Although I don't need any lectures about spoiling my kid or exposing her to the horrors of the Internet, thanks.)

*Computer coupons and discount info brought to you by: Savings.com (PS: Totally unrelated, but while I was scoping out computer coupons, I noticed some really great Home Depot coupons. So in case anyone out there is decorating a fantasy office like we are, you should check out the Home Depot deals.)

*For more info on now to protect your kids from Internet risks: Online Safety Tips

Baseball Baseball Baseball!

It's baseball season! Is everyone totally excited? How is your team doing? Winning? Losing? Are you loyal to one team, no matter how bad they're doing? Do you support the local arenas or root for players from out of state? Are you a Cosmo-style fan who only roots for the hottest players? (Kidding.)

We can't deny that most of the Good Authority are Yankee fans, but we're not the kind of Yankee fans that hate the Mets or anything. (Although we're not going to comment on how we feel about the Boston Red Sox.) And yeah, we know, everyone hates the Yankees, we don't need to hear it.

We have to admit that even though we're big fans of the Yankees, we're usually lazy fans who are more likely to watch the game on TV (preferably while drinking beer) than buy tickets and trek to Yankee Stadium...Although it does happen from time to time. We've also been to a bunch of Mets games, but we haven't been to Citi Field yet. We're not even used to saying Citi Field instead of Shea Stadium yet, but we'll get there.

But we do also travel a lot (World Domination takes a lot of work!) so we're always looking for fun things to do in any area we visit... including checking out the local home teams. (Of course, if they're playing the Yankees, all the better!) We had a lot of fun when we were in Chicago for BlogHer last summer, but unfortunately we were too busy to make it out to Wrigley Field for a game. And we're not sure that anything can top Jezebel's experience at Camden Yards a few years ago, when a drunk guy sitting in her section decided to throw his own impromptu dance party complete with a striptease down to his cow print boxer shorts. Shockingly the security guys were not amused.

If anyone has their own fun stories from live sports events, or you just want to invite us to come to a game with you, let us know!

Fantasy Office Decorating: Rugs

We're on a fantasy office decorating kick again. This happens lately every time one of us mentions Pregnancy Pact, one of the most Lifetimey movies that Lifetime has made in years, featuring a character who works for a super cool vlog for teens based out of a "hip" and "trendy" office. It always sets us off on a discussion about the type of office that we want for our empire one day.

We've decided that we need rugs, and not some thin gray crappy generic office carpeting either. We're thinking of going the oriental rugs route, for a few reasons:

a) We're classy and sophisticated like that.
b) We need a nice place to sit when we're organizing our collection of Cosmo clippings
c) We're prioritizing comfort over productivity.
d) Did we mention we're really classy?

This rug + us and our laptops + a stack of Cosmos + pizza and/or Doritos = blogging gold.


*Decorating fantasies brought to you by eSaleRugs.com.

Even if you don't watch Glee, you still need to see this...

Cosmo Campaigns for GOP Senate Candidate and Former Nude Model

Well, here's a headline I never thought I'd write, but it's true. Scott Brown, a Republican who's currently running against Democrat Martha Coakley in a special election to fill the Senate seat formerly held by the late Ted Kennedy, once posed naked for Cosmo.

Here's the centerfold, straight from Cosmo's website:



















Many of you probably hadn't heard about this nude photo, but there's a good explanation for that. You see, Scott Brown is a man. If a female politician had a nude magazine photo shoot in her past, we all would have heard about it because it would have provoked a lot more media/blogosphere/tabloid/AFA action alert coverage than this photo is getting. In fact, would a female politician even be able to get to the point of being a candidate for the U.S. Senate with a photo like this in her past? I think it's doubtful. Opponents would use it to question her character and there would be plenty of slut-shaming going around. And even if party leaders didn't personally see the photos as a big deal, they'd probably be more likely to pass over a qualified female candidate rather than risk dealing with a potential scandal.

You might think that since Cosmo is supposed to be the home of the "fun fearless female" and is packed full of sex tips every month, they might mention something about this sexist double standard. Unfortunately they're too busy drooling over Scott Brown:

Long before he was a politician, the Republican candidate vying for Ted Kennedy’s U.S. Senate seat posed nude for the centerfold of Cosmo. Scott Brown won our “America’s Sexiest Man” contest and appeared in the June 1982 issue. In those days he was a 22-year-old law student at Boston College who was cramming for finals just days before stripping down for our photographer.

“Here at Cosmo we’ve had bachelors go on to be actors, models, and reality show stars, so we’re thrilled that one has gone on to become a politician,” says Kate White, Cosmo’s editor in chief. Obviously we know how to pick ’em. This particular bachelor has always had political ambitions and even admitted to being “a bit of a patriot” when we interviewed him.

Compared to some men in the GOP, this politician looks pretty damn good for his age. We bet he still has an amazing body underneath his suit and tie. There have been plenty of pics of our president running around without his shirt, so now that a precedent has been set, we’re hoping to see Scott shirtless again.

Since we know the candidate so, ahem, well, we thought we’d help him out with a few campaign slogans:

Who Needs Joe Plumber When You Can Have Scott Six-Pack?

Scott Brown: A Name You Can Trust, Abs You Can Believe In

Vote for Brown. He Has One Hell of a Stimulus Package.

Leave your own slogans for Scott Brown below!

I understand why Cosmo wanted to highlight the random fun fact that a candidate for the U.S. Senate was once naked in the pages of their magazine, but I don't think they also needed to "help him out" with a fluffy post about how "thrilled" they are over his political career, complete with links to his campaign website and campaign slogans, but minus any comment about his actual positions on the issues that will most affect Cosmo's young female readership.

I know, I know. What did I expect, right? This is Cosmo we're talking about. And I get that their brilliant campaign slogans aren't "real", just really cheesy and cringeworthy. But it's still annoying to see such a shallow cheerleading post about the cute guy running for the Senate when this election is so important.

Cosmo can joke about Scott Brown's "stimulus package", but not mention his opposition to health care reform. They can brag about how they "know how to pick ’em", but not point out that his opponent, Martha Coakley, would be the first female Senator in the history of Massachusetts. They can talk about how good he looks for his age, but not mention a recent press conference in which "Massachusetts' leading advocacy organizations for women’s reproductive rights denounced Republican Scott Brown’s poor record on a woman’s right to choose". They can fantasize about seeing more shirtless pictures without letting their readers know that "In 2005, he sponsored legislation to allow doctors and nurses to turn away rape victims from Massachusetts emergency rooms if they objected to providing rape victims with emergency contraception."

In short, the fun fearless females who read Cosmo might have a lot to fear if Scott Brown is elected. Obviously I don't turn to Cosmo for deep political analysis or think that anyone should depend on them for coverage of important issues. But it would be nice if their editors could at least acknowledge that this election is critically important and not just an excuse to tell "package" jokes, and stop propping up the dated old idea that women will vote for the "cute" candidate regardless of his positions on the issues that matter most to them.

Reclaiming Our TV Addiction

Sometimes we miss the good old days when we were watching tons of horrible cheesy reality TV and writing about it all the time.  (Most of the time we're okay with writing about actual important topics instead.)  It's been a long time since a show inspired us to do weekly text message commentary.  The ____ of Love franchise just isn't doing it for us anymore.

Good thing we don't have Satellite Directv or one of those other satellite TV services, or we'd probably be even more addicted.  The NFL packages alone would keep the sports fans in the ESC glued to their TVs for even more hours every Sunday during football season.  And we still have a couple of friends who love Friday Night Lights, which airs on Direct TV months before the episodes are shown on NBC, and they keep telling us how we're missing out on all of the cheesy goodness.    

Yeah, you know what, screw it.  It's winter.  It's freezing cold out.  What are we going to do with our time?  Exercise?  Go out and interact with people?  No, we're going to order pizza and hang out on the couch making fun of bad TV.  Now we just need a friend with DirectTV to invite us over.  We'll bring Doritos, beer, and other healthy foods.